Tiger Woods' Wife Kicks Ass [Breaking]
According to the latest Associated Press update on Tiger Woods' car crash in Florida his wife,

Derek Jeter: Sportsman of the Year [Rumor Monger]
According to Sports Illustrated anyway. An email tipster says the magazine will hand the title to the Yankees captain on Monday in a story by baseball writer Tom Verducci. But what about Elizabeth Lambert?

Ousted Forbes Employees Rumored To Be Shopping a Tell-All [Print Is Dead]
Tipsters never rest! Today a source says that editors axed in brutal cuts at Forbes are rumored to be shopping a book about the Forbes brothers and a feud between them about the company's direction. The cuts at the magazine happened at the end of October and were 50 or so deep - the Los Angeles, Silicon Valley and London bureaus were axed entirely, and the layoffs spanned several days. Pe

Apparently No Tramplings This Black Friday [Black Friday]
Good job, shoppers: You didn't trample anyone to death this year. Things are looking positively lackadaisical out there. The Times even quotes a shopper as saying, "Everybody has been really pleasant." But what are we going to write about!? [NYT]

Susan Boyle Is Cracking Again [I Dreamed A Nightmare]
Congratulations, celebrity-industrial complex, it looks like you've sucked another relatively defenseless human into your boom-and-bust cycle of fame, crash, rehab, and relapse. And who can blame her. Susan Boyle, who underwent a mental health hospitalization after narrowly losing Britain's Got Talent, is back in action and on the verge of another nervous collapse, if