Things that Annoy me Today
1. Made up car names that are not even real words. 2. Double negatives. 3. Guys who leave the toilet seat up. 4. People who always need favors. 5. People who give their kids weird made up names. 6. People who go the wrong way in parking lots. 7. “Yes But” people 8. People reading over my shoulder. 9. People who let their dogs use my yard as their toilet. 10. People who over use quotes from movies.

Average
The average American woman is 5'4", weighs 140 lbs, and wears a size 14 dress. One-third of all American women wear a size 16 or larger. 75% of American women are dissatisfied with their appearance. 50% of American women are on a diet at any one time. Young girls are more afraid of becoming fat than they are of nuclear war, cancer, or losing their parents. 50% of 9-year-old girls and 80% of 10-year-old girls have already dieted. The "ideal" woman--portrayed by models, Miss America, Barbie dolls, and screen actresses, is 5'7", weighs 100 lbs, and wears a size 8.

THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY AT THANKSGIVING:
"Just reach in and grab the giblets." "Whew...that's one terrific spread!" "I'm in the mood for thighs!" "Tying the legs together will keep the inside moist." "Talk about a HUGE breast!" "And he forces his way into the end zone!" "She's 5000 pounds fully inflated and it takes 15 men to hold her down." "It's cool whip time!" "If I don't unbutton my pants, I am going to burst!" "It must be broken 'cause when I push on the tip, nothing squirts out." I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.

Do You Remember?
The other day I was talking to some one about all the old TV shows. You know the ones, your kids could watch them with out you having to explain what the actors are doing on screen. When they really were entertainment and not a social statement.  Are you listening Adam Lambert? How many of these do you remember?   A team Addams Family Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet Andy Williams Show Ann Southern show Arthur Godfrey’s Talent Scouts Bachelor Father Baretta Ben Casey Big Valley Bonanza Burkes Law Car 54 Where are you? Cisco Kid Courtship of Eddies Fat

Favorite Sayings
Some of my Favorite Sayings An opinion should be the result of thought, not a substitute for it. Hate is easy. Love takes courage You cannot unsay a cruel word. Every path has a few puddles We can not change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand The best sermons are lived not preached