Universe, Disturbed
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| Blog Name: | Universe, Disturbed |
| Url: | http://janicebrabaw.blogspot.com/ |
| Language: | English |
| Topics: | Poetry, Writing, depression |
| Description: | Janice Brabaw is the critically acclaimed author of Universe, Disturbed, her first collection of poetry that draws directly from her teenage and college journals when she suffered from debilitating depression. She is also the author of And Again: A Memoir of a Life Disordered which chronicles her struggles with borderline personality disorder. Janice is the editor of The Best of Stain anthologies and of the literary magazine Persephonous Blue, also. Born and raised in rural New York, she now lives in Brooklyn where she runs the Stained Glass Confessional and An Echo, A Stain reading series. Janice has performed at The Bowery Poetry Club, Otto's Shrunken Head, The Inspired Word, Soule Series, and the Library Lounge series at Telephone Bar. Her work has appeared in Poesis, The Toronto Quarterly, Ophelia Street, The Record, and The Cartier Street Review. www.JaniceBrabaw.com. www.JaniceBrabaw.com |
| Popularity: | 105 Followers |
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cloudswhere did y...
cloudswhere did you come fromit was just so sunnyand now you threatenwith your evasive grayi've been casting out demonsvoodoo spells on my lipsi've been dancing with devilsand laying down linescloudsyou're as dark as everand hovering at the horizonpissing on my daybreakand menacing my mascarai've been a very good girli haven't even cutthis feeling just appeared out of no wheredeep, lonely, and screaming in my gutcloudsscratching my eyes, making me crywith your dust and corrosive liesyour wet doesn't moisten my skinjust bloats and cakes a
cloudswhere did you come fromit was just so sunnyand now you threatenwith your evasive grayi've been casting out demonsvoodoo spells on my lipsi've been dancing with devilsand laying down linescloudsyou're as dark as everand hovering at the horizonpissing on my daybreakand menacing my mascarai've been a very good girli haven't even cutthis feeling just appeared out of no wheredeep, lonely, and screaming in my gutcloudsscratching my eyes, making me crywith your dust and corrosive liesyour wet doesn't moisten my skinjust bloats and cakes a
trickery
I'm gonna dig out this love of mine with a rusty spoon. I'll sit with the sore, the blood, the gore. Wait for the infection. Drain the pus. Wait and wait and wait and wait til the fade. Til it passes. Til the sun sets. The twilight, the daybreak. I will force hands and heart. I will twist arms and break ankles. I will stop this somehow, I will slam brakes and grind gears. Fast forward years. Rewind days. I will wring out the meaning of this lesson before I've learned it. Cheat life, the universe, the morals of the unrequited. I will break the surface, gasp for air, and only return to the bottom of the ocean if you take my hand and hold my breath.
I'm gonna dig out this love of mine with a rusty spoon. I'll sit with the sore, the blood, the gore. Wait for the infection. Drain the pus. Wait and wait and wait and wait til the fade. Til it passes. Til the sun sets. The twilight, the daybreak. I will force hands and heart. I will twist arms and break ankles. I will stop this somehow, I will slam brakes and grind gears. Fast forward years. Rewind days. I will wring out the meaning of this lesson before I've learned it. Cheat life, the universe, the morals of the unrequited. I will break the surface, gasp for air, and only return to the bottom of the ocean if you take my hand and hold my breath.
could be
perhaps you don't belongbut you are needed and desiredin the hearth, in the housebarefoot and warmed by captured firethere are arms for you hereand fresh baked breadthis is a place to wait out winterwhere the floor grows thick carpetthe windows thicken on their ownnorthern drafts howl but do not touchthe sink is always empty of dishesthe trash never overflowssoft lamp light and hot cocoa in unchipped mugsmulled apple cider whiskey on the stovethe world smells of cinnamon and cloveshot baths in a tub suddenly big enough for twohistory channel then cartoons at nightthe sun finds u
perhaps you don't belongbut you are needed and desiredin the hearth, in the housebarefoot and warmed by captured firethere are arms for you hereand fresh baked breadthis is a place to wait out winterwhere the floor grows thick carpetthe windows thicken on their ownnorthern drafts howl but do not touchthe sink is always empty of dishesthe trash never overflowssoft lamp light and hot cocoa in unchipped mugsmulled apple cider whiskey on the stovethe world smells of cinnamon and cloveshot baths in a tub suddenly big enough for twohistory channel then cartoons at nightthe sun finds u
....................
i can be something you can losesand between fingers, under the nailwhy do i think only in absencecan i fill a room or mean somethingmore than cubic space i occupyand statistics and bank account talleysdo you know the kinda lovewhen all you think isi'm in love i'm in love i'm in love i'm in loveover and over?it renders you retarded and inarticulatewhen you think of the personand all you can think isi love you i love you i love you i love youthen we get mad because three wordsdon't equal three thousandattention spans are shortand the days artificially long
i can be something you can losesand between fingers, under the nailwhy do i think only in absencecan i fill a room or mean somethingmore than cubic space i occupyand statistics and bank account talleysdo you know the kinda lovewhen all you think isi'm in love i'm in love i'm in love i'm in loveover and over?it renders you retarded and inarticulatewhen you think of the personand all you can think isi love you i love you i love you i love youthen we get mad because three wordsdon't equal three thousandattention spans are shortand the days artificially long
...............
i fell apartbut only for a weekso maybe it doesn't countmaybe i can still be forgivenand thought of as strongyou and i are at our bestbetween three and five a.m.there's no bullshit theneyes see clearly and wisesomeday i may be the girl you lost not to cocaine but brain staticstrobe lights behind my eyesravers, glow sticks and E
i fell apartbut only for a weekso maybe it doesn't countmaybe i can still be forgivenand thought of as strongyou and i are at our bestbetween three and five a.m.there's no bullshit theneyes see clearly and wisesomeday i may be the girl you lost not to cocaine but brain staticstrobe lights behind my eyesravers, glow sticks and E
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