Despite the surprises...
...we strive forward in the call of adoption. Eyes wide-open, yet hearts tender. We have witnessed the need--it is now carved into our souls. Yet, instead of closing the blinds, we have flung-wide our doors...Heavenly Father, make Your home with us...and bring whomever you shall.A voice cries:“In the wilderness prepare the way of the LORD; make straight in the desert a highway for our God.Every valley shall be lifted up, and every mountain and hill be made low; the uneven ground shall become level,

surprising difficulties of international adoption, #4
The final surprise (at least, that I'm sharing in this series) that we experienced with Micah happened during our first several weeks with him.Again, the best comparison I can make is to that of an engagement. Over the years, Vince and I have had the privilege of counseling engaged couples as they prepare for marriage. And the reality is for most couples, their unfolding marriage is not what they were expecting...sometimes is better, easier than expected...but, most often it's much more difficult. Difficult doesn't equal bad. Difficult simply reflects the fact that humans are physically, emotionally and spiritually-complex beings -- therefore, marriage is a complex

surprising difficulties of international adoption, #3
In-Country Experience:This was another one that caught me off-guard. From the first moment we arrived in Ethiopia, I felt totally conspicuous. Of course, for obvious reasons: two white faces in a sea of brown ones. I had experienced this before during our travels to China and Central America. But this time my self-awareness was a little harder to brush-off.Much of what I wrestled with was probably my own imagination. However, I simply couldn't keep from thinking that every set of chocolate eyes which glanced our direction pegged us as an adoptive family. No, "adoptive family" isn't a bad word -- but it is probably a painful reminder.

surprising difficulties of international adoption, #2
Court (this one may be Ethiopia-specific):When you finally submit your dossier (application and documentation) to the country you wish to adopt from, you become increasingly obsessed with receiving a referral (ie- matched with a child/ren). It's practically all you can think about -- kind of like a bride anticipating her wedding day. (And we've all known an obnoxious bride, or two.) And to intensify matters, family and friends are constantly asking, "any news yet?" So, really, there are very few moments when you're not actively anticipating the call from your agency.You begin to tell yourself (and even begin to tel

surprising difficulties of international adoption, #1
Age and Gender :Since our first adoption would also be our first experience parenting, it made sense that we would request to adopt an infant (~0-12mos). Even our social worker and agency encouraged us in this decision. I believe most social workers/adoption agencies recommend families to adopt children within age-ranges that they've had previous experience with -- however, there are always exceptions to this recommendation.Vince and I were confident that adopting an infant was the right decision for us. That said, our firm decision still did not shelter us from sadness. Sadness that our narrow age-range EXCLUDED SO MANY CHILDREN. There was a hint of